Innocent Idiots

We've all been there before. We become shining examples of foot-in-mouth syndrome without even realizing it and then wonder why everyone is laughing. Once we figure it out, we feel like prize idiots. Sometimes, it's a simple matter of not thinking. We fail to realize that what we said may be taken a different way and may even be insulting or offensive to someone else. If that is you, then I have to say - you are an idiot. Maybe there is at least some redemption, though. If you realize the error of your words and feel some sort of mortification over it, you may yet learn.

Unfortunately, it has been my experience that these embarrassing utterances are more often than not simple cases of an unsuspecting, innocent speaker walking headfirst into a hidden innuendo. Bless their poor, innocent souls. They have no idea that what they are saying is fodder for their audiences to giggle behind their hands like five-year-olds.

I, dear readers, have been a part of this group a time or two in my life. It comes from growing up sheltered and being kept ignorant of those double entendres that my sweet momma tried to keep away from my little ears. Ironically, she was usually the one to catch me saying something questionable and giggling like the afore mentioned five-year-old.

I particularly remember one such incident happening when I was about twelve years old. I was looking out the window as my mom drove down the road, and I saw where a truck had broken down on the side of the street. Luckily, a friendly neighbor with a handy set of jumper cables had come to the rescue. I, in my ignorance of both innuendos and cars (see previous post), said, "How nice of that man to jack him off."

My mom instantly burst out laughing and still brings it up to this day, ten years later.

So many cases like this spring to mind. Unfortunately, those little incidents don't stop when the mind is thoroughly corrupted with all things dirty, thus losing the innocence. Even then, we sometimes realize that what we're about to say could be twisted into a perverted meaning, and we just have to hope that we have no warped minds among us. And of course, there always are.